Growing up and even recently I was being tossed in the ocean of uncertainty of the Character of God. Thinking somehow instead of trusting Him I could control Him with what I did or didn't do. If I wanted my "vats overflowing" then I would make sure my offering was sacrificial. If I wanted His wisdom then Bible study would increase daily. If I wanted my marriage to be successful then we'd better repent if we fornicated before the rings and the cake! If I wanted to hear "well done faithful servant" then my "holy check list" better be being checked off daily. If I wanted His protection then I'd better be towing the line of spiritual "goodness"...You know what I mean..Make sure He's #1 in the morning, don't make your prayers short, rather long and "holy like". Better not "rush into His presence" with crying out to Him. Acknowledge His greatness before making your supplications known. If I wanted forgiveness and mercy I better be sure I was forgiving others. If I wanted Him to acknowledge my prayers then my sins were being confessed and the slate was clean between us. (to be really honest with you guys I would fall asleep confessing all my daily know and unknown sin before I even begun with anything else). Bottom line if I wasn't doing this "walk with God" program correctly then I wouldn't be blessed and even more frightening I would be cursed by Him..something bad would happen. You guys have been there "oh my car broke down, this is because _____"." My marriage is in shambles because our family hasn't been participating in regular worship at our church." My children have walked away from God because we did this or didn't do that with the youth group."... This may seem like a horribly scary relationship and that we are slaves to our ever increasing desire to "control the way things go in our lives"..It's really draining and sad. There is no "joy in Lord"..Consequently our other relationships in our lives begins to be dictated in like manner. Full of expectations and requirements in order for us to respond with acceptance and rewards also punishment and painful withdraw.
The good news!! Your blessings and love from the God of love is not based on what you do or don't!! When you get this it's freeing and your heart is filled with this new wonder and love relationship with the Father. Then reality hits "Oh no, I am no longer pulling the strings on God's favor in my life. I have to trust this love now, what if something bad happens, what will He do when I give my marriage and my children and finances to Him to do with what He will"? Will He "Job" me! LOL...He say's those in fear have not been perfected in His love. I speak to myself here. If we spend less time trying to impress Him or get His blessings and more time just resting in His love, unconditional love, then I believe Him that He will perfect His love in me. He doesn't intimidate us into loving Him, He doesn't force us into "perfect Christians". There is no fear in love. The age old saying "go with the flow" is true..His flow, His perfect, loving flow. Jeremiah 29:11 comes to mind a lot for me. He knows the plans He has for us, and TRUST it's the perfect one for you!
The author Christina Wing is a free believer in Christ and a beloved sister. Visit her on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000193752597&v=info&ref=ts#!/profile.php?id=100000193752597&ref=ts
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